For personal use and select distribution only; ©1999 by Denise Rushton

Wounded Heart

Chapter 4

Alec pulled the first carriage up to the door, and turned to his family. "Let me go in first, and break it to Hetty and Olivia," stated Alec as he alit from the carriage. He went onto the porch, gave a cursory knock on the door and let himself in, where he found Hetty relaxing in the parlor. Alec called for Olivia and Rachel Lynde to join him, and said to all three at once, "You’re not going to believe this, I can hardly believe it myself. Felix is alive, this morning he came home."

After the women gasped and otherwise expressed their amazement at the happy news, Alec warned, "He’s not the same Felix. His leg is injured and he is much thinner, with a couple of scars on his face. We all agreed to be strong for him and I have to ask that you do the same." The women somberly nodded their heads in agreement, and Alec went to the door and signaled the rest to come in.

Olivia and Rachel met Felix at the door, welcomed him warmly and with many tears, and reluctantly let him go so he could see Aunt Hetty. Felix had been told of his aunt’s poor health, and limped to where she sat in her wheelchair.

"Oh, Felix, the price you have paid for doing your duty," Hetty thought to herself, but she hid her true feelings behind a rather brusque greeting to Felix. He bent down to give her a kiss and the brusqueness melted away, and she stroked Felix’s face and hair. "Oh, my boy," she sighed. "Thank God you’re home."

A feeling of thankfulness pervaded the Christmas dinner, yet it was tinged with some awkwardness. Felix was a different person, more remote and reserved, and the adults of the King family were not accustomed to the change in him. Frankly, they were still trying to get over the shock that Felix was still alive, not to mention home at last. The only lightheartedness at the table was brought by Daniel and Montgomery, who were thrilled to have a real live war hero at the dinner table. Felix had given his brother his army cap, which was now resting proudly in Daniel’s lap.

The family tried to avoid mentioning the war, correctly assuming that it was the last thing that Felix wanted to hear about. However, in avoiding the topic, it seemed to fill up the room. Felix especially felt this tension, and was getting peeved that every time he would look at someone, they would already be staring self consciously at him, and would look quickly away when he met their gaze. "It’s like I just grew a horn out of my forehead," said Felix angrily to himself, and this annoyance made him unable to do little more than pick at his food.

Aunt Hetty prodded him, "Felix, you’re so thin already, you have to clean your plate." His look of aggravation was lost on her as she prattled on to Janet about how she would have to fatten him up.

After the meal was finished, and the dishes cleared away, Felicity poured each adult a small glass of Hetty’s famous currant wine. This potent drink was made for sipping, as Felix well knew, but the stress of the day compelled him to bolt the bracing liquid down in one gulp, much to the astonishment of the rest of the Kings. Felix felt abashed as he realized his faux pas, but then he got defensive—why shouldn’t he have a drink or two after all he had been through? It was this defensive mode which rose up against his mother’s look of admonishment, and he leapt to his feet as best he could.

"I’ve got to get out of here. I’m suffocating in this place!" All eyes at the table were focused on Felix as he yelled and wildly grabbed for his crutch. He moved away from the table and limped as quickly as possible out the door, neglecting even to take his coat.

Janet cried, "Go after him, Alec!" but Gus’s words held him back.

"Alec, let him be. It takes a long time to get adjusted to a change like this."

Alec had started to rise from his seat, but realized Gus was right. Gus was the only one who had any experience that might come close to all that Felix had endured, and Alec felt so impotent in the face of all that.

Felix’s sudden departure brought the evening to a earlier conclusion than usual, and Janet and Alec wanted to get home in the hopes of finding Felix there. However, a search of King Farm showed that Felix had not returned.

Cecily tucked the exhausted Daniel into bed, and decided to turn in early herself, leaving Janet and Alec to their own devices at the kitchen table, alone with their fears and confusion. It was to this scene that Felix entered into about an hour later.

Felix blustered, "I’m sorry I left like that. I just couldn’t stay—it was like I was going to explode. I feel like I don’t fit in anymore...it’s so different here!" Janet and Alec sat silently as Felix unburdened himself, and then Alec rose to put an arm around his son.

"I wish I could say it would all be alright, but I can’t. I have no idea what you went through in France. I’ve never experienced a war, so I don’t know what to do to help you now, except to love you."

Janet added, "You have to give it some time, Felix, you haven’t even been home 24 hours."

"I know," whispered Felix huskily, and Janet rose to join the two in a hug, and then the three went upstairs to go to sleep.

TO BE CONTINUED. . .

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