Izzy wasn't about to handle anymore of Felix's distraughtness. Sure, she had been home for only one day, but that was already too much. She continued to follow Felix.
"You're acting like a coward, you know that? In the seven years we've known each other, I've never known you to chicken out. Don't start now!"
"You don't get it, Izzy!" exclaimed Felix as he walked toward the woods. "You'll never know."
"What's it going to take? What do I have to do to get you to talk to me?"
"Leave me alone!"
"No, I won't! You've been left alone for too long. You've got to talk about what happened over there."
"I don't want to talk about it!"
"Felix, things happen. Bad things happen. And they happen to good people. We can't change the past. You can't do anything about what happened over there. Isolating yourself from the rest of the world isn't going to help either. And it won't bring Elbert back."
Felix stopped dead in his tracks. He turned to face Izzy and asked, "How did you know about Elbert?"
"Cecily got a letter from a man who served with you, and he told her that Elbert died. She showed me the letter and said that the information in it might help you express your feelings about what happened."
Felix was surprised. He sat down on a nearby tree stump and covered his mouth with his hands, not knowing what to think. Izzy walked over to where he was and knelt down beside him. "Tell me what happened, Felix. Please," she said, softly.
He removed his hands from his face. He took his right hand in her left one, and she stroked that same hand with her right hand. "It was late at night earlier in the month, about three weeks before I came home. Elbert and I sat in the trenches together waiting for orders. Soon we were ordered to get ready to advance. He asked me to go see his family if something happened to him. I told him not to worry about it, and that we'd both be home soon. Then we advanced. A few seconds later, I heard a shot. I turned around and noticed someone on the ground. When I got closer, I saw it was Elbert. I felt the blood on his chest, noticed it on my hand, and I started to drag him away. I kept reassuring him and myself that we were going to go home. As I continued to drag his body away, something exploded in front of us. I was flung to the ground, and everything went blank.
"When I woke up, there was a pain in my arm. I suppose I broke it when I fell. I looked over at Elbert; he was dead. He bled to death. I didn't know what to do."
Felix began to sob uncontrollably. Izzy took her right hand and joined it with his left. She looked directly into his eyes and told him, "There was nothing you could do about it."
"I could've stopped the bleeding. I could've gone for help. I could've--"
She interrupted him. "No, Felix. No matter what, he might have died anyway. You didn't mess up; his death wasn't your fault. It was all up to Providence."
"But I lost him, Iz. I can't live with that on my conscience."
"You may have lost him, but life goes on. You need to move on; think about your future. I love you too much now to let you slip away from me."
The two of them hugged, Felix still in tears. At least now Izzy had the hope that he would overcome his demons, and not a moment too soon. As they let go of each other, they heard a roar in the distance. They looked over in the direction of the roar and saw what seemed to be a black bear several yards away. Felix wiped his eyes, collected himself, and instructed his sweetheart, "Izzy, see if you can find some big logs. Oh, and you might want to leave the lantern here." She did as she was told.
Meanwhile, Felix quietly sat on the stump waiting for her. The bear came closer to him, but he didn't move. Suddenly, it let out another roar. Felix shut his eyes tight, as the roar was so loud. Soon Izzy returned with three large logs. "Quick! Take one!" she whispered. "They're too heavy."
He grabbed one out of her arms, and she dropped the other two...loudly. The bear inched even closer to them, obviously very angry. Felix jumped up and threw the first log at the bear. It didn't do much. Izzy quietly ran off in search of some more logs. Felix got the two logs she had left behind and threw another one at the bear. It became more and more angry, and it ran up to Felix and attacked him. Its razor-sharp claws scraped down Felix's chest and knocked him to the ground. Izzy saw this and rushed over to help. She put down the two logs in her arms, grabbed the other one she left earlier, and hit the bear over the head. "That was for attacking my beau!" she exclaimed.
Felix struggled to get up. He began to walk toward the logs Izzy had just brought when the bear's claws scraped down his back, only this time he got away before he could be knocked down again. Izzy grabbed another log and hit the bear again. "You're not messing with him again!"
"Iz, let me try it once. Please?"
"Go ahead."
Felix picked up the last log. The bear was very angry now. As it stood on its hind legs and began to chase Izzy, Felix, with all his strength and might, hit the bear in the back of the head as hard as he could. That blow knocked the bear unconscious. "And that was for Elbert, all my other friends, and any other Canadians who have died so far in this senseless war!" he announced.
He threw the log to the ground, grabbed Izzy's lantern and her hand, and ran back to the lighthouse as fast as they could go. They were not about to get attacked again. When they returned to the lighthouse, they were extremely tired from fighting the bear. However, Felix was worse off. He had deep scratches on his chest and back and had excruciating pain in his right arm. They entered almost out of breath.
After catching her breath, Izzy said to Felix, "I'm glad we're away from that bear now. Maybe you should sit down and rest. Besides, I have to clean your wounds."
Felix sat on the bed while Izzy began to boil some water in a large black pot. Then she came over to the him and looked at his coat after he took it off. "The bear dug right through it. There's no blood on the coat, but your shirt is bloody and ripped almost to shreds. Take it off."
"You can't work around it?"
"No, of course not. Please, Felix, take off your shirt."
This time, he did so--no questions asked. Afterward, he gave it to Izzy, and she ripped it up to use for bandages. Then she took the pieces of fabric and dipped them in the boiling water. Meanwhile, he started to massage his right arm and do the exercises Dr. Snow gave him to do. One of them was to lift it up to a ninety-degree angle with his body. Another one was to join his hands together (left over right) and stretch them in front of and behind his body. When he finished those exercises, he massaged his arm some more.
Izzy came back over to him with the boiling water and bandages. She placed the pot on the floor and sat in front of him. She grabbed a bandage from the pot and carefully placed it on one of his scrapes. As she did so, he grunted in pain. "I'm sorry; I know it hurts, but it won't be for long," she told her one true love.
The scrapes on his chest were fairly close together. They stretched from the bottom of his shoulder to his waist on both sides of his chest. As she continued to bandage his scrapes, Felix asked her, "How are you going to hold the bandages in place? I can't do it, at least not after you take care of my back."
"Oops. I never thought of that."
"I can tell you how to make a plaster, like how they did with my cast."
"Alright."
"Okay. You're going to need some flour, some more water, and obviously, another pot."
She got out the flour and another well-sized raven black pot. "Now what?"
"Put some flour in it. Then add some water and mix the two together with your hands. As you mix, it should become stickier."
Izzy followed his directions, and she brought the newly-made plaster over to the bed. "I suppose now I rub this stuff on the bandage."
"Yeah; rub it on the top, the sides, and the bottom."
She carefully massaged the plaster on to the first bandage. Felix closed his eyes as she did this; her touch seemed soothing to him. She continued to bandage his wounds and put the plaster on them. A few minutes later, she ran out of it. When she stopped rubbing, Felix opened his eyes and asked, "What happened?"
"I'm out of plaster," she replied.
"Add more water."
She did, and she re-mixed it with the flour that remained. Then she added another handful of flour to it and kept mixing. She wiped her hands with a towel that was sitting near the stove and went to check the water with the bandages. It was starting to cool off, so she brought it back over to the stove and re-boiled the water.
"Felix, maybe you should grab a chair and come over here. I think it'll be easier on both of us," Izzy suggested.
He went over to the table and sat down. When the water finished boiling, she brought the bandages over and set them on the table. Then she set the plaster next to it. Finally, she finished bandaging his chest. "Okay, Felix. Now you're going to have to turn around so I can bandage your back."
Felix turned his body so his chest faced the back of the chair. The scrapes on his back weren't as bad as the ones on his chest; these ones stretched from the nape of the neck to the middle of the shoulder blades. Izzy ripped up the rest of his old shirt in to average-sized squares--big enough to cover the wounds on his back. Next she bandaged it and washed her hands to remove the dried-up plaster. Meanwhile, Felix made his way back to the bed. As she dried her hands, Izzy asked him, "Do you think the plaster will work?"
"It will. I know it will."
"We should take you to see Dr. Snow tomorrow. That way he can clean them and bandage them properly."
Felix suddenly had another thought. "Iz? Come here for a second."
She walked over to the bed and sat next to Felix. He took her hands in his, looked directly into her eyes and said, "I'm sorry about the way I've been acting."
"Felix--"
"No; you were right. So were Felicity and Cecily. I was acting like a coward. I apologize for not letting out my feelings sooner, for my distraughtness, and for causing you so much pain, because I know it hurts you to see me unhappy. I still think you're perfect, amazing, kind-hearted, and fun to be with. Even through my pain, I still loved you, and that's not going to change."
Izzy wasn't sure what to say. She just sat there with tears in her eyes, moved by his words. Felix saw her crying and didn't know what to do. "Are you okay?" he asked. "Did I offend you?"
"No," she replied, wiping her eyes. "I was just so moved by what you said that I cried."
They hugged each other, both of them in tears this time. Izzy was still moved by his words; Felix cried because of that, and because he was now finally free of the demons that held him captive since Elbert died. Now he could enjoy life as it was supposed to be.
When they let go, he whispered, "I love you, Iz."
"I love you too. I suppose I should go, huh?"
"Yeah, I suppose. I'll drive you back to your house."
"Thanks." As she put her coat and hat back on, she added, "Maybe you should stay with me tonight. Besides, we have to go see Dr. Snow tomorrow anyway."
"Yeah, and I've decided to return home tomorrow. So, don't tell anyone, not even Cecily. I'll put another shirt and coat on, pack, and we'll leave."
It didn't take long for Felix to get ready. Soon, they drove off to Izzy's house. She helped take his things into the house and went upstairs to one of the other bedrooms. "I'm giving you Morgan's old room for the night. My room is next to it on the right. You can come see me in a few minutes; I'm going to write some and get dressed for bed," she told him.
"I'll come see you."
"Okay. There are some biscuits in a bowl on the table in the kitchen. You can help yourself."
"Thanks. See you in a few minutes."
Izzy went to her room, and Felix went to the kitchen to eat. Once she entered her room, she changed into her nightgown. Then she went over to her desk and began to write in her diary. She wrote:
December 28, 1914 (Part 2)
I went to see Felix tonight. He was still acting distraught, but then I mentioned Elbert and he, eventually, let out everything. Suddenly we got a major surprise--a black bear. He attacked Felix but he got the bear before it got me. When it was all said and done, Felix ended up with scrapes on his back and chest. We returned to the lighthouse, and I bandaged his wounds. We're going to see Dr. Snow tomorrow so he can clean the wounds and bandage them properly.Later we came to my house, so it would be easier for us to see Dr. Snow. Felix is going to sleep in Morgan's room tonight.
Here's another thing I noticed: Felix has a good strong physique. I didn't tell him that, but it stood out in my mind while I bandaged his wounds. I like a man who is strong.
I should stop. Felix is supposed to come see me before we go to bed.
Izzy Pettibone, Age 19
As Izzy started to put her diary away, there was a knock on her bedroom door. She put her housecoat on and opened the door. Sure enough, Felix was standing there with anticipation in his eyes.
"May I come in?" he asked.
"Sure."
He entered her room and looked around. It was an average bedroom with lily-decorated wallpaper and lavender curtains. Her desk was located on the right-hand side of the room, and there was a small vanity on the left-hand side. On its left was a twin-size bed with a hope chest in front of it. The closet was on the opposite side of the bed. Across from it was her dresser drawers, painted white to match the light, summery aura of her room. "Nice room, Izzy."
"Thank you."
Felix walked over to the desk and sat in the chair, while Izzy brought over the bench from her vanity. "So how was your trip, Iz?" he asked.
"I loved it. The ride over on the boat was wonderful; it was so peaceful and relaxing. Once in a while I would go over to the side of the boat and just look over at the frozen water. At one point, I closed my eyes and saw your face. It wasn't one full of turmoil, either. It was smiling at me; you were smiling at me, Felix. It helped me feel better.
"Later I arrived in Charlottetown. Arthur met me after the boat came ashore. He said to say hello to you and to your aunt Hetty. Anyway, a few minutes later I got on the train to come home to you and to Avonlea. The ride home was so loud and unbearable; I couldn't stand it. Almost everyone was yelling at each other. I swear, Felix, I wanted to strangle some of those people. I was glad to get off the train and see Cecily. I missed Avonlea so much, and I missed you."
"I missed you too. I missed your sense of humor, your warmth, your companionship, your beauty, and everything else I love about you."
They stood up and took each other's hands. Then Felix looked down into Izzy's deep brown eyes and said, almost in a whisper, "I love you, Iz."
"I love you, Felix King."
They leaned into each other and gave each other a long, passionate kiss. After they pulled away, Izzy asked, "Do you remember our first kiss?"
"Of course I do, very well. Do you regret deciding to stay?"
"Not for a minute. It took me a while, but I finally realize that if I went to Boston, I would be miserable right now, 'cause you weren't there, and we would've parted ways without making things right."
"I know. It would have been on my conscience until either I died or I went to Boston to get you to come back."
"You would've done that? I mean, you would have left Avonlea, your job, and your family and traveled all the way to Boston to try to bring me back?"
"Yeah! I loved you too much to let you leave me, and I still love you too much to let you leave me now."
"I feel the same way. Of course when you went away for training and then to war there was nothing I could do about it."
"I know."
They walked over to the bed. Izzy turned the covers down and got in. After that, Felix sat down on the edge of it and propped her bare feet up in his lap. Then Izzy had a small request. "Felix, will you do something for me? Will you get my diary off my desk?"
He carefully placed her feet back down on the bed and went to the desk to get her diary. Then he gave it to her, and he sat back down on the edge and propped her feet up again. He also began to stroke them lightly. "Just be glad my feet aren't ticklish, Felix King, or you would get it from me big time," she told him. "Anyway, I wanted to read a section of this to you."
As she flipped through the pages, he asked, "What about?"
"I want you to know what I did and felt after you left for war." She stopped flipping the pages. "Here it is."
The section read:
July 31, 1914
Felix left to fight in the war today. I was very sad; my one true love was going to be thousands of miles away, fighting in a bloody, senseless war, in a section of the world that hardly any of us have visited. I wonder what it's like in Europe when there is no fighting.Well, before he left, he promised me that he would come home in one piece. I told him to make sure he didn't go back on it. After that, he swung me around in his arms and gave me a kiss. I was surprised, but I didn't mind; we are in love, and everyone would have found out anyway, so it didn't matter.
After the train left, I ran home and cried for about an hour. I didn't know what to think. My Felix was gone and there was nothing I could do about it. Now it's all up to Providence, I suppose.
About the only thing I can do is go on with my life as usual. That's what I intend to do. Sure, I'll miss Felix terribly, but I can't let his absence consume me. Now I'm going to go visit Cecily.
Izzy Pettibone, Age 18
"So, you just went on as usual?" Felix wondered.
"Yeah, but I did it for you."
Felix leaned in toward Izzy, using his elbow to hold him up. "And I'm grateful."
They exchanged a quick kiss, and Izzy said, "Good night, Felix. I'll see you in the morning. Put my diary back on the desk when you leave, will you?"
"Sure. Good night, Iz."
He placed her feet back down on the bed and took her diary from her. Before leaving, though, he gave her another quick kiss. He put her diary back on her desk and left her bedroom. Soon after, he went to bed himself. He was going to have a long day tomorrow.
Close this window to return to the index